Love Works
by SansRaison
Summary: This is an R/J story. It's about their relationship and love and the"s" word. It takes place a week after the Face-Off episode. Please review. :
1. Window Watching

Ok.so this is my story. I've never written a fanfic before so please bear with me. Don't ask me what rory is doing up at this hour. I don't know if it's a regular time people are up at..scratch that, I know it isn't a regular time. But please humour me. (FYI: I didn't spell humour wrong..in Canada its "O-U-R" as an ending. E.g.: colOUR, neighbOUR, favOUR. You get the picture. So I hope you enjoy my fic. Please review. Good and bad reviews are welcome. Just so you great readers out there know (I am a total suck up, I know) there will only be one chapter.as of this moment. But you never know, so I wouldn't put that in stone. Read away (.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own anything. I am in no way affiliated with Gilmore Girls or Ms. Sherman-Palladino.  
He peeked in her window to see what she was doing. He'd been doing this often for the past couple of weeks. She never saw him since he was so quiet. He would just stare at her and revel in her beauty. This time he thought he would be a little more courageous. He tapped on her window. She looked back from her bed and saw immediately smiled when she saw him. She quickly got up and opened the window.  
  
"Hey. What are you doing here, Jess," she asked.  
  
"I just had to see you. I know it's late, but I couldn't sleep," he answered. Well he was right that it was late. Almost 1 a.m. She wondered what her mother would think if she knew Jess of all people was knocking on her window late at night. Forget that. She knew what her mother would think.  
  
"Come in, it's chilly out," whispered Rory. Jess climbed in and just stood in front of her. He just stared. Rory was starting to feel a little nervous. Was something the matter? She told him as much by asking.  
  
"Did something happen? Are you alright, Jess?"  
  
"I'm fine Rory. Can't a guy see his girlfriend?" He said that last part with, what seemed to Rory, a twinge of anger. Rory stepped closer to Jess and kissed him. To Jess it seemed more desperate than usual. He leaned into the kiss and put his arm around Rory, pushing her into him. Rory pulled away from the kiss to look up at Jess. She smiled up at him, sensing his arousal.  
  
"Someone's certainly happy to see me. Does Luke know that you're out," inquired Rory.  
  
"Actually he doesn't. He's spending the weekend with Nicole. They're pretty serious." Jess answered.  
  
"Well isn't that interesting."  
  
"What is it Gilmore?"  
  
"Well it's just that Luke is out with Nicole. Which means that you have the diner all to yourself. It's 1: 11 am and you're with your girlfriend. Very interesting." Rory smiled innocently at Jess.  
  
"What are you proposing, Miss Gilmore?" Jess knew exactly what Rory meant. She wanted to go to the diner for a couple of hours and make out, read and talk. It was just that lately he felt their relationship was ready to go to the next level. It sounded so cheesy, but he wanted him and Rory to be lovers. But before anything like that happened he wanted to know that she loved him. Loved him the same way he loved her. And if she did, then he was sure they were both ready.  
  
"What do you think mister? We better go now, though. We don't really have a lot of time. I have to be back here before my mom wakes up" Rory backed up away from Jess and just stared at him. He had a confused look on his face.  
  
"What is it," he asked Rory.  
  
"Well I sort of need to change into something more suitable. I mean I like my pajamas, but I don't think I can wear them to the diner. So could you possibly leave while I change."  
  
"Are you sure you want me to go while you're changing? Maybe I could help." Rory felt a shiver go down her spine. She didn't know if he was serious or if he was kidding. With Jess it was always uncertain. That was probably part of the reason why she loved him. She was feeling a little bold, so she decided to let him stay and watch.  
  
"Well you might as well stay. It's cold out. But I don't need your help, I think I can handle it." Jess wasn't expecting that to be her answer. He thought she would smile in her amazing innocent way and tell him to go out the window. Yet she didn't. He thought he had Rory pinned down. He watched her all the time. He memorized her expressions, the way she looked at him when he talked to her. The way she got all solemn when she was reading, like nothing else was going on in the world. But she still managed to surprise him. She walked over to her drawer and pulled out a pair of socks. They were blue with black stripes. She placed them on her bed and walked over to her closet. She pulled out a red v-neck shirt and faded jeans. She walked back to her bed and began to remove her pink pajamas. She first removed her top and revealed a blue bra. She put on her red shirt and proceeded to her jeans. After putting them on she continued to her socks.  
  
All the while, Jess stood there mesmerized. He couldn't believe how beautiful she was. She didn't even hesitate. But she didn't look at him during her change. He noticed Rory was looking around for something. Jess realized it was the sweater on the floor in front of him. He grabbed it and walked over to Rory, who stood frozen in her spot. He thought of handing it to her, but instead he decided he would help and put it on her. He slowly put the sweater on her and she put her arms in the sleeves. He realized for the first time just how delicate Rory was. He then went on to do up the buttons. He started at the top and slowly worked his way down. When he did the last button he placed his hands on her waist and affectionately caressed her. He then looked into her eyes and tried to read what she was thinking. 'God, she looks so beautiful,' Jess thought. He quickly glanced at her alarm clock which was on her bed stand. It read 1: 19 a.m.  
  
"Let's go," Jess said quickly. And with Rory grabbed a novel and they climbed out her window. On their trek to the diner, Jess grabbed Rory's free hand and kissed the back of it before he moved onto the palm. Rory smiled up at him and held his hand the rest of the way to the diner. Once inside, they went upstairs. Rory made her way to the couch and sat down. Jess just stood a few feet away.  
  
"What do you want to do first," Jess asked to break the silence, even though it was calming. He made his way to the couch, sat down and placed his hand I hers.  
  
"I don't know. Maybe we could read. I might even be willing to read Hemingway." Jess smiled at that and Rory continued. "Or, you know, we could think of something else we could do. I'm not even tired."  
  
They eventually decided they would read, after a few lingering kisses. Jess decided to take control and read to Rory. Rory was captivated by his voice. She had never particularly liked Hemingway, but he made it beautiful. She never knew The Sun Also Rises was so interesting. Or maybe it was Jess who made it seem that way. He made everything interesting. She was always thinking about him. And since that sweater encounter in her room, she was very tense. Rory had been thinking about her feelings for Jess a lot the past week. After the Distillers concert she lied to her mother about where she had been. It wasn't that she was afraid to tell her mom she had been out with Jess, she was just confused. Before he came to take her out as a surprise, she had been very angry with him. But the minute he showed up outside the arena, she forgave him. After the concert, Jess drove her home and they just sat in his car for awhile. They talked about how Holden Caulfield was the universal teenage boy. They had had many conversations like that in the past but this one was different. It was on this night in Jess's car at nearly 1 a.m. that Rory realized she was in love with Jess Mariano.  
  
Jess sensed Rory staring at him so he looked down at her head laying on his lap with her body sprawled out on the couch. He closed the book and stroked her cheek.  
  
"What are you think about, Gilmore?"  
  
"You. You're just.you."  
  
"Really? How deep."  
  
"I just mean you're so wonderful. I can't stand Hemingway, and, yet, when you read it, it's so beautiful. I think that's what you do."  
  
"And what is that?"  
  
"You make things better. You make them whole. Like you make me whole." Rory said that last part more softly. She never once lost eye contact with him. For some reason Rory was feeling daring that night and continued her little speech. "Whenever you're not with me Jess, I think about you. Something about you is so enchanting. And I've learned to need it. I need you Jess and I love you with all of my heart."  
  
Jess wasn't expecting that. The way she described him was the same way he felt about her. She completed him. He wanted her to know, but he had a feeling she already did. He went on anyway.  
  
"I love you too. I've been in love with you for a long time, Rory. I think ever since that day you came to visit me in New York. I've grown to need you too. You don't know this, but I've been looking at you through your window for the past few weeks. Nothing perverted, but I want to see what you're up to. Just looking at you makes me feel so good. I just can't stop it. You probably think I'm nuts," Jess said that last part jokingly but he secretly thought that she would think he was weird. She proved him wrong by kissing him. The kiss was fierce. Like she wanted to do that for a long time. Jess found it very nice. It wasn't often that she took control and he found it very sensual. He responded the same way, like he hadn't kissed her in days when in reality it had only been minutes. The kiss became very passionate with tongue caressing tongue and Jess moved the kiss to her earlobe. He started sucking on it while Rory moaned and breathed deeply. She was overwhelmed at how amazing it felt even though it was a small gesture.  
  
He continued his movements down her neck. Part of him didn't know that he was doing this and another part thought it felt so natural to be this intimate with Rory. Rory got up completely and sat on Jess with one leg on each side of him. He quickly looked at her for consent and put his hands around her back and gently stroked it. While his hands were exploring her upper body, his mouth was linked to hers. The kiss was very needing. It was as though they had both been waiting for something like this to happen. But wasn't that true? Hadn't he wanted him and Rory to be intimate? And hadn't she wanted Jess to lover her in every way?  
  
After Jess had brought his hands under Rory's shirt to touch her closely, he began to remove her bra. He slowly brought is fingers to the clasp and undid it. He carefully pulled down her bra past her shoulders and began to stroke her chest.  
  
Rory was sighing in pleasure as he moved his hands around her chest and exhaled sharply when he brought them to her breasts. Rory began to undo Jess's buttons and slid the shirt off him. This revealed his torso. Rory was amazed by his beauty. She felt overdressed so she began to remove her shirt, but Jess stopped her.  
  
"Rory. I'm sorry. I'm pushing you, aren't I?" He stated gently. "We haven't even discussed this, have we?"  
  
"You're not pushing me, Jess. I wanted it as much as you did. But you're right, maybe we should talk about this." Rory stated almost ruefully. "Well it obviously isn't a secret we both want each other physically. How long have you thought about it."  
  
"Do you think I thought about it at all"  
  
"Well I know I thought about it. I've been thinking about for the past few weeks. In fact, two weeks ago I started taking the pill and I bought condoms to be even more careful. I didn't know if we would do it at all, but I guess I wanted it to happen so I decided to be prepared. I thought you thought about it, too."  
  
"I did think about it. It's all I've been able to think about for the last little while. Sex and how you would feel about it. But I didn't mean to make you feel pressured just now." Jess stated apologetically.  
  
"You weren't making me feel pressured. I want us to make love, Jess. I want you and I, as corny and stupid as it sounds, to be together in all ways and to express our love in all ways. But maybe not tonight. I mean today, it's four in the morning. I guess I better be getting back." With this, took off her shirt and placed her bra on correctly in front of Jess. Since changing in front of him in her room, she wasn't shy around him anymore.  
  
"Don't do that to me, Rory. It's evil." Jess said playfully.  
  
"I know you want to, so do I, but we have to wait until a more appropriate time." Rory said after she had put her shirt on. Rory bent down and whispered in his ear. "It won't be long, I promise."  
  
"I'll be waiting." Jess said in her ear. They shared one final kiss before Rory left for home. He offered to take her home, but she insisted she would be fine. It was Stars Hollow after all, so he relented. 'God, I love her' Jess thought as he looked out the window and saw Rory walking home.  
  
"God, I love him," Rory said to herself as she walked home. For the first time in the last few weeks, she felt complete. Love worked well for her. And Jess might not have admitted it but it worked well for him, too.  
  
The End. 


	2. What's There To Be Afraid Of?

Ok. So I decided to continue this story even though I said it would only have one chapter. I think this chapter will mainly be Jess and Rory talking and a little spice, but nothing too serious. Sorry to anybody who wanted some more action. Maybe next chapter. This picks up when Rory leaves the diner and is going home. So you know the disclaimer part: I do not own Gilmore Girls or any of the characters. So please enjoy and review.  
  
***********  
  
Rory was careful enter her house through her window as she returned from the diner. She had left it slightly ajar when she had gone off with Jess. Jess. She couldn't stop thinking about him. He was perfect, everything she had ever wanted. He was brilliant, charming, he loved to read, and he was beautiful. But most of all, he loved her and she loved him. She wanted to scream it to the whole world. She wanted to tell everybody who had thought Jess wasn't good enough for her, or they weren't meant to be together, that they were dead wrong. They were perfect together, made to be with one another. Rory suddenly remembered Jess putting her sweater on her. She felt extremely nervous at that moment. Not like she was afraid of Jess, but, rather, excited. The whole time with Jess had been amazing.  
  
Now that she was in her room, she thought about changing. It was 4:19 a.m. so she could sleep for a few more hours, but Rory wasn't tired. She decided she would force herself to sleep and changed back into her pajamas. As she crawled in bed, she wondered what it would feel like to wake up with Jess next to her. She had thought about this in the past, but this time it felt like it would be a reality. She closed her eyes and tried to go to sleep with the vision of her and Jess in an intimate embrace.  
Later that morning, at 10 a.m., Rory got out of bed and went to the bathroom. After taking her daily shower and her other morning things, Rory went into the kitchen. She ate some Cinnamon Toast Crunch and then went to the answering machine:  
  
"Hey sweetie, I'm at the diner. We have a large group of people from Saudi Arabia visiting. They have a lot of demands, but they're really rich and I think they're related to the royal family there. Maybe they'll pay in oil. I mean they've got lots of it and Lord knows we are in dire need of oil these days. The prices are preposterous. I got to go now, honey. Abdul Rashid is having a fit. I'll be home pretty late tonight so don't wait up. Ciao."  
  
Rory smiled at her mother's message. She was relieved her mom didn't know she had gone out early in the morning. Rory decided she would head to Luke's for her coffee. She hadn't had a cup since last night!  
  
When Rory arrived at the diner, she saw that it was bustling with customers. She was pretty surprised because it was busier than usual Saturday mornings. She sat on a stool and waited to be served. Jess finally came to her about ten minutes later.  
  
"God Rory, I'm so glad you're here. We are really busy and Luke is going to be gone until tonight. Could you please help Caesar and me? I swear you'll get all the coffee you want." Jess said in a pleading voice.  
  
"How can I say no to coffee? What do you need me to do?"  
  
"Thank you so much," Jess said and leaned down to kiss her. "Since you can't really cook, why don't you serve and take orders, okay?"  
  
"Sure, no problem." Rory went behind the counter go pull out a pencil and notebook and began to take people's orders. After 2 hours and what seemed like an endless amount of pancakes and eggs, Rory took a break. Most people had gone, and the ones that were still there were reading or socializing. She got herself a large cup of coffee and sat down at a table. Rory glanced around the diner for Jess. He emerged from the back of the diner and his eyes immediately fell upon Rory. She smiled at him and he walked over to her table.  
  
"I see you're enjoying your coffee. Well you deserve it. Thanks for helping me out." Jess leaned down and kissed Rory on the forehead. Rory smiled at him and nodded at him to sit down.  
  
"So what are you planning on doing today, Jess," Rory inquired.  
  
"Well I'm going to be here until around five, then I was hoping to spend time with you." Jess stated truthfully.  
  
"Well that sounds good to me. We could read a book together at home. Or you could read to me like you normally do with your Barry White voice," Rory noticed the look of disapproval on Jess's face. "Or you could just read in your beautiful Jess voice. Do you want me still stick around and help?"  
  
"No, the crowd usually calms down after this time. They start back up again at suppertime, which is great because that'll leave Luke with all the work. So I'll see you at five-ish?"  
  
"That sounds great," Rory said as she got up. Jess got up to and they shared one long and emotional kiss before Rory left.  
  
Rory returned home and decided she would do her homework before Jess arrived. She wanted to get it out of the way for the rest of the weekend. After completing that, she tried to find a book they could read. She finally decided on The Catcher in the Rye. Even though they had both read it, she was in a Salinger mood and she figured Jess would go along with it since he liked the book. At 5: 16 Jess knocked on the door. Rory rushed to open the door. Once open, she seized him and placed kiss on him.  
  
"Rory, I know I'm irresistible but try to contain yourself. People might see and get the wrong idea," Jess said to Rory after their kiss. Rory had to laugh at that, but she didn't care what people thought of hers and Jess's relationship. They could think what they wanted to think.  
  
"Get inside, Dodger. We have business to take care of."  
  
"Someone's a little eager. Although you might want to tone it down, neediness is not very erotic to me. I like it when a woman plays hard to get, it's pretty sexy," Jess replied jokingly.  
  
"You take that back or we don't kiss for a week, mister."  
  
"I'm sorry, Rory. I don't know what came over me. I think it was the heat. I've been feeling a little dizzy lately so I wasn't aware of the words that were coming out of my mouth."  
  
"It's the middle of February, but I will accept that as a valid reason for your slip up. Now come in." Once inside the house, Rory lead them to the couch. Since she was already being Miss Daring, she decided to sit on his lap once he was seated. Jess was taken by surprise, although he had noticed that she had been braver with her passion lately. She was sitting in a way where her legs were spread out on the couch and her bottom was on his lap. 'I could get used to this,' thought Jess.  
  
"So, what are we reading today," he asked her. Rory answered him by picking up a paperback copy of The Catcher in the Rye. "Salinger, huh? Well I've read that book about twelve times, but I guess another time won't hurt." Jess began to read to Rory. He read every word with expression. Salinger wrote Holden to be sixteen-year-old boy, but sometimes Holden narrated like a cynical old man, and Jess made it show. He read to her until they reached about the twelfth chapter. He stopped because they started a discussion about Holden's fear of growing up.  
  
"It's not that he's afraid of growing up, he just doesn't want to." Rory said matter-of-factly.  
  
"He is afraid of growing up. He hates the whole world around him. He's practically screaming that during the whole book!"  
  
"He doesn't hate the whole world around him, he hates the adult world."  
  
"And he hates it because he knows sooner or later that he'll have to grow up and be an adult. That proves that he is afraid to grow up."  
  
"You make it sound like he's running away from it. He is an adult at times during the book. When he gets a prostitute to come with him into his hotel room."  
  
"But he never actually sleeps with her because he's intimidated, afraid."  
  
"What does he have to be afraid of?" Rory asks.  
  
"The whole world around him is, in his own words, phony. To him everyone is a fake. Even though he's phony himself. Like when he's on the bus and he's talking to his school mates mom, he lies like crazy. But he has to because otherwise he's a goner; he's grown up. He's failing school because he doesn't want to grow up. He's afraid, Rory. Afraid of living life because he sees childhood as innocent and the adult world as evil."  
  
"What is wrong with the adult world?" Rory asked her voice becoming soft.  
  
"To him, everything. He describes his sister Phoebe as some saint when she's just a child and every adult as a jerk, save Mr. Antolini. He's afraid of intimacy. He's afraid of sex." Jess said that last part looking directly into Rory's eyes. Neither of them spoke, but they both knew what the other was thinking. Rory slowly lowered her head to Jess's and pressed her lips to his. The kiss was very furious, as though neither of them could get enough. Jess moved Rory so that she was lying on her back against the couch and continued to kiss her with all his might. Rory started unbuttoning his shirt as quickly as she could and eased the shirt off his shoulders. She stopped kissing him to take a look at his chest. His beautiful body.  
  
Jess slowly got up and put his hand out to Rory. She took it and got up with him. When they were both standing, Jess touched the hem of Rory's shirt and lifted it up to reveal her stomach. He took a long look and continued moving the shirt. He lifted it all the way to her shoulders when she then lifted her arms and pulled the rest of it off.  
  
"Take off your pants." Jess said to Rory. She obeyed and began to undo her jean button, then unzipped it. She removed it entirely and stood there. "Sit down," Jess commanded to Rory. Again, Rory complied. Jess sat down next to her and put one arm around her back and used his free hand to touch her body. 'This feels so good, but I'm afraid. Just like Holden.' Rory thought while his hand is stroking her breasts.  
  
"Do you want me to go further," Jess asked as his fingers are just about to go into her panties.  
  
"My mom will be home soon and I don't want her to find us doing this. I'm sorry," Rory replies.  
  
"It's okay. This is up to you, I don't want you to feel like you want to do anything." Jess said as he stands up and puts his shirt back on.  
  
"Jess I want to do this. But in a more romantic setting where we don't have to worry about my mom or Luke barging in. Please don't be mad with me."  
  
"I'm not mad at you Rory. I know you want your first time to be special, you deserve that. I guess we'll just have to wait a little longer. I love you."  
  
"I love you too, Jess." Rory put her clothes back on and kissed Jess one last time. This time Jess is the one who left. As he made his way out, he thought about Rory's reaction. She stilled lived in her innocent child-like world. She wasn't ready to go to the next level. Sometimes she was and sometimes she wasn't. She was like the lagoon in Central Park in The Catcher in the Rye. She "partly frozen and partly not frozen." She wasn't ready, she just wasn't ready. And Jess wasn't about to force her.  
**********  
  
Okay that's it for the second chapter. Please review. I'll see if I can have the next chapter up by Tuesday or Wednesday. Bye. ( 


	3. Insane Trust

Ok.This is the third chapter. Thanks for all your reviews (even to the person who said I had a sick mind) I like the feedback. I'm so incredibly sorry it took so long to get this chapter up. I'll try to be speedy from now on, but I can't guarantee it. Cuz I have school and I'm writing this story and I like to have some resemblance of a life. But anyway..please enjoy and review.  
  
- - SomalianBeauty.  
  
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Rory was still sitting on the couch when her mother came home. She didn't here the door open and close. Probably because she was in her own world, thinking deeply. Lorelai was surprised to see her daughter perched on the couch at such a late hour. Lorelai crept up slowly and yelled "Boo." This caused Rory to jump up and scream in horror. When she realized it was her mother, she was immediately relieved.  
  
"What do you think you're doing scaring like that?" Rory asked in a playful voice.  
  
"Sorry, sweetheart. It was just so easy. You were just sitting there. I won't do it again."  
  
"It's alright. So how was work?"  
  
"Pretty hectic. Sookie nearly burned the inn down, the Saudis were relentless in their demands. How were we supposed to know they can't eat pork? But they weren't too bad. Michel was, well, Michel. So it was pretty much you're average, run-of-the-mill day. How about you? How was your day?" Lorelai asked in a perky voice.  
  
"It was fine. I went to the diner in the morning and Jess needed help since the diner was packed and Luke was away. Then I came home in the afternoon, finished my homework, and Jess came over and we read for a bit." Rory responded. Rory knew she was leaving out the whole, you know, almost-having- sex part. But she didn't want to tell her mother about that yet. She knew she had promised her mom that she would tell her when she and Jess would have sex.  
  
"So he came over and you guys read. Is that all that happened?" Lorelai asked, sensing Rory was leaving something out. Lorelai knew that Rory was thinking about making love to Jess. As a mother, she was nervous. Especially since the boy Rory was ready to give herself up to was the type of boy Lorelai had hoped Rory would never date. But she was beyond her disapproval of Rory and Jess dating. She knew that Jess made Rory happy, no matter how much she sometimes wished Rory would go with another boy.  
  
Rory thought about the answer she would give her mother. That night, she had already lied. She had told Jess that her mom would be home soon so that they wouldn't have sex. when she knew her mother would be home later than usual. And right now her mother was asking her if something more had happened between her and Jess. There were two options here. She could either told her mother that her and Jess had almost had sex or she could lie to her mother and say that Jess left after they read. Rory was getting sick of lying. But she didn't want to deal with her mother right now. She just needed to think.  
  
"Nothing else happened, mom. He came. We read. He left." Rory said in the most casual voice she could muster but on the inside she was afraid her mother would see right through her.  
  
"Okay. Why were you just sitting on the couch? Are you alright?"  
  
"Oh. I fell asleep and I just woke up before you decided to scare me half to death." Rory said in a jesting voice.  
  
"Well it's eleven right now. Do you want to go back to sleep or eat something first?"  
  
"I'll just go to bed."  
  
"Okay. Me too."  
  
Rory went into her room and changed into her pajamas. She got into bed and closed her eyes. She tried to sleep but it wasn't working. She got up and went to watch some television. She settled on what seemed to be a decent show. Just as she got used to it, a new scene came on with a couple kissing and starting to shed their clothes off. 'Great. Everything I do relates back to my life' Rory thought. She flicked off the television. And looked at the clock. It was eleven twenty-nine. She thought about going back to sleep, but she wasn't tired. Rory then thought of calling Jess. She knew it was late for a phone call, but she had a feeling he would be up.  
  
Rory picked up the phone and went into her room. She sat on her bed and dialed his number. After three rings someone picked up.  
  
"Hello." It was Jess  
  
"Hey." Rory answered.  
  
"Oh, hi. How are you?"  
  
"I'm good. I couldn't sleep so I decided to call you. I know it's late."  
  
"No that's fine. I was actually thinking of calling you. How was the rest of your day."  
  
"It was good. Lots of sleeping is good. I just went to sleep after you left." There was a long pause when Jess decided to speak .  
  
"Rory, about earlier. I think I was going too fast. I know early this morning you said that you were ready but I'm not sure you meant you wanted to do it twelve hours later. What do you think?" Jess asked quietly  
  
"I just.I don't.I do love you Jess. And I want us to make love, but I don't know what happened. I just freaked out. Maybe it was too soon. I don't know. But it wasn't your fault. I think we both got carried away. You probably think I'm insane."  
  
"I do think you're insane, Rory. But not for not being ready to be intimate."  
  
"What can I say? I'm a regular maniac."  
  
"So you want to slow things down a bit?"  
  
"I don't know. I just need time to think. It's just.I've never done this before, and I guess I'm kind of nervous. I might.I .this is going to sound so stupid." Rory took a deep breath before she spoke again. "I think I'll be bad at it."  
  
There was a long silence again. Jess could hardly believe what Rory had just revealed to him. It was hard to understand that Rory thought she wouldn't be a good lover. But he knew otherwise. To him, there was no way Rory could do anything wrong. Didn't she know she was beautiful? Didn't she know he loved her?  
  
"How can you even say that?" Jess said, breaking the silence. "You wouldn't be bad at all." Jess really didn't know what else to say. He was hoping that he could somehow convince her that she would be an unbelievable lover.  
  
"I don't want to slow things down Jess. I want to do this, but it's like I see two outcomes. We could do it and it would be fine. Or we could do it and it would be anything but fine. I . I don't even know what I'm talking about."  
  
"Are you worried about not measuring up, or is it you're thinking about my past experiences?"  
  
"It may have crossed my mind." Rory answered slowly.  
  
"Well don't think about that. Rory, I've never been in love before. I have had sex before, but if it was with someone that I loved it would have been so much more. There's no way you could be anything but amazing because I love you."  
  
"I love you too." Rory looked at the clock again. It was now eleven fifty- seven. "Jess I know it's late, but could you come over. I'm not sleepy and I know we're talking on the phone, but I want you here."  
  
"Sure. I'll be there in a few minutes."  
  
"Okay, bye."  
  
"See you in a bit."  
  
Rory didn't bother to change out of her pajamas. She laid on her stomach on her bed waiting for Jess to arrive. She didn't know why she asked Jess to come over. Didn't she admit she was a little uncomfortable with intimacy? And here she was asking him to come over to her room late at night. She felt like such a hypocrite at that moment. Yet, she felt glad he was coming. Whenever she was going to spend time with him she became oddly happy. She assumed it was because she was in love with him, but she never felt this way before. She knew she loved Dean but the feeling she had for Jess was different. It was a whole new level of emotions, a new level of passion, a new level of love.  
  
Meanwhile, Jess approached her window. He lightly tapped on it. Rory got off her bed and went to open the window.  
  
"Hi." Jess said.  
  
"Hey, come in." Rory replied. Jess came in and stood there. He wasn't sure what he would do next. Rory took control of the situation and kissed him fully on the lips. Jess kissed her back sweetly and let their foreheads rest on each other's. They walked over to Rory's bed and sat down. They were silent for awhile when Rory decided she would break the silence.  
  
"So what have you been reading lately?"  
  
"Nineteen Eighty-four by George Orwell but his real name is Eric Arthur Blair. He was born in India which I thought was pretty interesting. I just started but it's pretty good. It's about communism and socialism at its worst. I like it. What about you? What are you reading, I mean?"  
  
"Nothing new at the moment."  
  
"I'm shocked."  
  
"Yeah. It's not everyday you see Rory Gilmore without a book in hand. Thanks for coming over so late."  
  
"It's no problem. I brought the book with me. I can read it to you if you want." Jess said with an ever-so-slightly pleading voice.  
  
"Sure. That'd be great." Jess then took off his jacket and brought the book out of his pocket. He laid down on her bed and Rory snuggled up next to him. He began to read and Rory found herself being lost in his voice for what seemed like the millionth time. He sounded so pure. So angelic. She remembered how everyone thought that Jess wasn't good enough for her. She remembered how people thought that he was a rebel, a bad influence. Her mother. Luke. The whole town. Yet, in that moment, with him reading to her, she felt as though she was undeserving of him. As though he was the one making the mistake by being with her. She had always been intrigued by Jess and somehow her interest only grew with each day. It was like he was a deep ocean with his sentiments. She could drown in them. Simply to know him made her content. He was everything.  
  
Jess continued reading. Rory, without noticing, placed her hand on his chest and caressed it. It felt so natural to do so. Rory continued her actions and put her hand underneath his shirt. That was when Jess stopped reading and decided to just enjoy the sensation. After several moments of her movements, Rory realized what she had been doing. She stopped abruptly and sat up.  
  
"Sorry." Rory said quickly before getting up and walking to the door.  
  
Jess got up to and went to stop her. He grabbed her wrist, twisted her around and kissed her hard on her lips. Rory tried to break the kiss but Jess backed her up against her door and continued kissing her. Rory slowly began to give in and started to kiss him back. After just seconds they were kissing each other roughly, not caring about anything at that moment except for kissing each other with this passion. Jess put his fingers in Rory's hair before he began to kiss her cheek, then her neck. His lips stayed on her neck and he began to suck the skin there. His hands then moved to her waist and he pushed her against him before their lips were glued to each other's again. This kiss was much like the previous one except that with every moment that passed, it grew more passionate. Jess's tongue was dueling with Rory's for control. He finally won when Rory accepted his movements and moved back against the wall. After what seemed like an eternity, the two broke the kiss to breathe. Rory took her hands off Jess and tried to move away with his hands were still on her waist. He slowly removed them before walking back to the bed and laying down on it with his hands covering his face.  
  
Rory sank to the floor and put her head in her hands as well. Minutes passed before either of them spoke. They were both caught up in what had just happened. It wasn't as though they had never kissed before, it was just that the sexual tension was so thick. Jess sat up and Rory stood up.  
  
"Jess--"  
  
"Rory--"  
  
Both of them began at the same time. It was Jess that continued.  
  
"Rory, I think we both want to do this but whenever we start anything it stops just as quickly. You haven't ever done this before and I understand that. Everyone wants their first time to be special. But Rory you have to trust me. Don't think about what other people will think of you. It doesn't matter. To me you'll always be Rory Gilmore. And I'm pretty sure that's the way it'll be to them. You have nothing to lose, Rory. If anything, you'll end up with so much more from this. I will too. Just trust me."  
  
Rory then walked up to her bed and sat next to Jess.  
  
"I trust you, Jess. I trust you." Rory placed her hand in Jess's and looked into his eyes. They kissed again. Jess then put on his jacket, kissed Rory on her forehead and left.  
  
Rory lay back on her bed. 'He's right. I am insane.' Rory thought. Think. That was all she could do at the moment. And she had a feeling she'd be doing much of just that for the next little while.  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
OK there is chapter 3...hope you liked it. Please review, it's much appreciated. 


	4. Cereal Games and Ice Hotels

***Ok guys, here's the next chapter. Thank you for all of your great reviews. I really wasn't sure how to write this next chapter. I mean I had a lot of ideas, but I didn't know how to put it together. Another problem I have is that I'll start writing something a certain way and then something else comes into my mind and I change it everything I wrote (or almost everything). I noticed my last chapter had some stupid grammar mistakes. Some words in the wrong tenses; I hate it when I post up a chapter and I find mistakes I hadn't already found before. It drives me mad. So I have to say sorry to the people that caught my errors; I'm pretty embarrassed. I think I'll have only 2 or 3 more chapters for this story. I can't really prolong it because it's only about one thing.you guys know: sex. But I'll do other stories. So anyway.I've been babbling for too long. Enjoy this chapter and REVIEW...PLEASE REVIEW!!!  
  
Oh yeah.I think I only mentioned the disclaimer once and I don't know how many times you have to do it so: I do not own Gilmore Girls; I am in no way associated with the show or cast or crew. So .there. Now read away..REVIEW ALSO PLEASE!!! *~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
It was ten a.m. on Sunday morning and Rory was still in bed. She wasn't asleep but was lying in bed with her eyes wide open. To a stranger it would seem very odd, in fact it was indeed odd. But Rory just could not bring herself to get out of bed. Her mother had been in earlier and Rory faked sleep. She knew her mother was heading to Luke's and Rory wasn't in the mood to be there. She also knew that if she got out of bed, she would wander into the kitchen, realize there was nothing edible and end up going to Luke's out of necessity. At that moment she cursed her mother for not ever learning how to cook. Or at least for not putting her in a cooking class so at least she could learn.  
  
Eventually Rory did get up and went to the bathroom. After that, she strolled into the kitchen and tried desperately to find something to eat. There was bread, but no peanut butter, no jam, no cream cheese or anything to put on a sandwich. She found cereal, but there was no milk. Some people might have eaten the cereal bare, but Rory could never eat cereal without the milk. Her search for food soon came to an end. She knew that it had to come to this. She had to go to Luke's.  
  
Rory went back into her room and changed into something more appropriate, but she wouldn't have minded wearing her pajamas to go eat. She then came out of her room, put on her shoes and left to the diner.  
  
When she arrived at Luke's, she saw her mother sitting at a table and sat down next to her.  
  
"Hey Rory. I thought you would never come out of bed. What did you do last night anyway?" There was the question. Could Rory say that she almost considered sleeping with her boyfriend, or would it be better for her to say that nothing happened and that she was just tired even though she got hours of sleep the day before?  
  
"I was just really tired, mom. I woke up just a little while ago and there was nothing to eat. I mean there were things that would have been alright to eat, but nothing whole and fulfilling."  
  
"What do you mean? There was cereal."  
  
"But no milk. I can't eat cereal without the milk because then I can't play the cereal game." At that moment, Luke walked up to their table.  
  
"What's the cereal game?" He asked.  
  
"Come on Luke, you know. The game where you're eating cereal normally at first, but when there are only 25 or so pieces left, you start eating them by two's so they'll all be together and happy. And then you get down to the last one, and he's all alone and you feel bad for him but then you remember it's cereal and it has no feelings and you eat it really fast. That cereal game." Lorelai explained.  
  
"Well I'm sorry I didn't know. I'm a normal person, remember? What do you want to eat, Rory? You're mom's already ordered." Luke asked.  
  
"I'll have some cereal, if you please." Rory answered.  
  
"Good answer." Lorelai responded. Luke threw them an irritated look.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
The rest of Sunday passed uneventfully. Rory went back home as soon as she left the diner. She thought about going to see Jess for a bit, but just as quickly dismissed the idea. She knew that she and Jess needed a little space for the next few days. She needed to think more. And yet, she didn't need to think. She knew what she wanted. It was just that whenever the opportunity arose, she would get uneasy. She really didn't know why that was. Sometimes she thought it was because Jess had had other lovers and that somehow she just would amount up to them. She didn't even know who they were, yet she felt like they had to be much better than her. And more beautiful. Rory knew she wasn't ugly. Sometimes she even thought that she was cute and even really pretty. Then she remembered Shane. Rory knew that Shane meant nothing to Jess but she was still gorgeous and probably seemed really sexy to Jess. Maybe Rory needed to stop worrying about that. She knew that Jess loved her. But there is always that feeling deep inside that never leaves. It can disappear, but never completely leave. Maybe Rory just thought to much, period.  
  
Well whatever the reason it was that Rory felt awkward about sleeping with Jess, it didn't keep her from sleeping. She went to bed and Sunday soon became Monday. This day brought Rory's usual Chilton routine. Get up, go to the bathroom, take care of her personal business, eat a pop tart, go to Luke's, kiss Jess goodbye, go to school, stay at the hellhole for hours and take the bus home. Except that she never saw Jess for the next 3 days so she couldn't kiss him goodbye. He must have also felt that they needed space. But over these few days Rory came to an important decision. She knew that she wanted to make love to Jess. She needed to lose all her insecurities. She was ready to make love to Jess. She just hoped that he would want to now. Hopefully, she didn't blow her chance.  
  
On Thursday night, while Rory was doing her homework when Lorelai walked into the room.  
  
"Sweetheart, I was just talking to Sookie on the phone and we're going to have a sort of girls night out tomorrow. Except it's more like a girls weekend out, because we won't be home until Sunday." Lorelai said looking at her daughter pleadingly.  
  
"That sounds like fun. You deserve a girls weekend out. I mean you hardly go out on these sort of things. Well you went out with Sookie, Jackson, and Alex earlier this month to New York. On the winter break you went to Montreal to go and sleep in the ice hotel. And-"  
  
"Ok, if you don't want me to go, I get it."  
  
"No I want you to go. I was just trying to be funny. So was I funny?"  
  
"Don't quit your day job." Lorelai said as she gave her daughter a disgusted look.  
  
"I don't have a job." Rory replied with a dose of matter-of-factliness.  
  
"Well, then you have nothing to lose. Go out and become a comedienne. Struggle for years to get gigs and meet all the important people in the business. Starve yourself and live on the streets. You might have to sell your body. It doesn't matter. You just want to make people laugh and feel good. There is no nobler thing. I support you one hundred percent. But it probably won't be worth it because, and don't take this the wrong way but, you suck."  
  
"You could have just said that. You didn't have to drag it out like that, mom."  
  
"Love ya, hun. So do you mind if I go."  
  
"Go ahead. It's fine. Have fun."  
  
"You're getting the Jess syndrome." She said as she threw Rory a look of shock.  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"It's worse than I thought." Lorelai then hugged her daughter and left the room. She came back quickly to say something to Rory.  
  
"Just so you know, it wasn't Montreal that we went to. It was St. Catherine's, Quebec."  
  
"Thanks for correcting me, mother."  
  
"Pas de problème, mon petite choux." And with that, Lorelai left the room for good. Rory couldn't help but smile. Her mother was great.  
  
Rory finished up her homework and decided that she would call Jess. She hadn't spoken with him since she came to her decision. Rory wasn't ready to tell him yet, she just needed to hear his voice. She went out of her room to get the phone, and returned quickly. She dialed the memorized number and waited for him to pick up. It rang four times before it was picked up.  
  
"Hello." It was Jess.  
  
"Hey. It's me." Rory answered slowly.  
  
"Hey. How are you?"  
  
"I'm good. How are you?"  
  
"Same. Sorry I didn't call you this week."  
  
"No it's fine. Sorry I didn't call."  
  
"It's okay." There was a long pause before Rory spoke.  
  
"I missed you." Jess paused as well.  
  
"I missed you, too." Rory smiled to herself as Jess said that. She knew that he didn't like to get emotional and that he wasn't the best at expressing his feelings. But lately he was being more open and she liked it a lot.  
  
"So do you want to hang out tomorrow? After school, I mean?"  
  
"Sure. We could see a movie. I haven't seen a good movie in awhile, what's playing?"  
  
"Maybe we could see an old movie. I think they're playing Casablanca."  
  
"That sounds good. So I'll come to your house tomorrow at 8-ish?"  
  
"Great. So I'll see you tomorrow."  
  
"Tomorrow it is."  
  
"Bye."  
  
"Bye."  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
As Rory hung up, she felt bad for deceiving Jess. They were not going to a movie. Her mom was going out for the weekend and that meant she would have the house all to herself. She would be completely stupid if she let an opportunity like this pass her by. Tomorrow, she and Jess would finally consummate their love.  
  
*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
That's it for this chapter. I know nothing juicy happened, but that was on purpose. I still hope you liked it. Please review. REVIEW, REVIEW, REVIEW. I need those reviews. I'll be ever-grateful. Thanks so much. 


	5. Author's note

I began this story about 5 years ago and I must say that I almost forgot completely about it. Almost. It's impossible to forget something you created and put on display for the world to view and comment on. I was 15 when I started this story and it is a little embarrassing to read it, but I am in no way ashamed. When I reflect on it, it becomes painfully clear that I was a horny little kid. But, hey I was a kid. I sincerely thank everyone who commented and reviewed this piece. I remember it made me feel like I was the shit for receiving such positive reviews. I've matured a lot more and I think I might just continue this piece or right another one. I've always loved reading fanfiction, and even though I've taken quite a long hiatus, I will continue to write it. I am an aspiring author and I am an avid supporter of reading and writing everywhere. I love to read a new story and live in someone else's world if only for a few short hours. Discovering a new writer or a wonderful story is like a drug for me. I'm sure it's the same way for many of you out there. I really appreciate people who write these stories not only for their entertainment but for their obvious love of the craft.

I guess I'm writing this little note for two purposes: 1) I'm letting you know I'll continue with my work and 2) I wanted to get a few things off my chest. I remember one review in particular that said my story seemed a bit rushed and I must wholeheartedly agree with them. Reading it again and knowing it's my work makes me feel funny because I know I can do better. It takes time and commitment but it's well worth it. I'll be updating soon so stay tuned. I'll try to finish this story and see where it goes; I may end up writing a new one in fact. THANK YOU ALL AGAIN!


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